There is an appointed time for everything, and a time for every affair under the heavens...A time to scatter stones, and a time to gather them; a time to embrace, and a time to be far from embraces...A time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away. ~ Ecclesiastes 3 ~
I have had this verse going through my head for some time now. (Not to mention the song by The Byrd's, "Turn, turn, turn (to everything there is a season)!!)
Even more than ever, I realize that our lives are broken up into seasons. Seasons are filled with change and so are our lives. Before you know it, you are embarking on a new season. Instead of looking negatively on the current season I may be in, I need to embrace it and treat it as a gift, because it is fleeting. I have been with both of our children virtually every day of their lives and yet I am still amazed at how quickly they have grown up, as if I still missed something. No longer are we in a season of newborns and onesies, first steps and first foods, diapers and highchairs. Rather than allowing my heart to break every time I contemplate this, I choose to embrace the beauty of the learning, the chatting back and forth and their independence. The season we are in. I think this is also helpful as I address my current season of infertility. I have to remind myself that while we continue to be proactive and find solutions to it, that I also embrace the journey and realize that it is a time of waiting. Sometimes not so patiently, but waiting.
In this journey of seasons, I've also become aware of how often I negatively journey in a season. I have recognized how often my mind goes to negative thoughts that do not embrace the daily struggle, nor the vocation of wife & mother. How easily these pop up when discipline is needed with the kids, there's another spill on the floor, another day is started with early-rising children or my agenda and to-do list is not fulfilled. I probably would not even be aware of the negative effect these have on my day had I not noticed how frequently they take residence in my head. And then the startling revelation that these overflow into my words and actions as well. Am I being the gentle, kind and generous mom I am being called to be? Embarrassingly, no. Far from it. How quickly I can become bothered, annoyed and angered. How in the world does this happen? I believe that if I am letting my emotions decide my response, the first reaction I give, will indeed be the one that is the least forgiving and kind. The quickest response is not always the correct response.
I see my life's seasons differently these days. I desire to live more fully in the present moment. My present season. Each one is filled with amazing blessings and gifts, waiting to be given. How much I might miss if I am not thankfully embracing each one. I strive to live life more fully as I fully live in the season!