Boyhood

The following is an excerpt from Boys Should Be Boys by Meg Meeker that I found interesting. Thanks to Patty for suggesting this book a few weeks ago in my com-box! I'm finding it beneficial.


And one lesson we should all learn is that while mothers want more for their sons, the truth is that sons need less. Boys need fewer toys and fewer clothes. They need more time with their mothers and fathers, less time in structured events, and more time being bored-yes, bored- so that they can use their imagination and creativity and figure out what to do. Young men need less face-to-screen with electronic life and more time face-to-face with people. Less television, video games, clothes, telephone bills, sports events, and preschool hours mean less stress for mothers and more time for boys to figure out who they are and what they want out of life.



As I've been spending more time these days just watching my boy I'm hearing him say 'I'm bored' but I'm seeing him become so creative. Building, following picture directions, imagining and creating beyond what he ever allowed himself to do in the past. It's a lot of fun being a fly on the wall in his little boyhood space and watching the gears turn.

Raising Awareness: A Photo Post

Many of you followed along here last January as we all prayed for my great-niece, Hazel who was born with a Congenital Heart Defect, Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome (HLHS). We all prayed for a miracle, along with her parents. Staying here with us on earth only 13 days, Hazel left a lasting imprint in so many lives. Since then, her mom couldn't help but find a way to be involved and help other families. Yesterday was the 1st Annual CHD Walk in our area.
I know there are many causes out there and many of them are worthwhile. When a disease touches a special loved one in your own family, you cannot help but want to support and love them by supporting their cause. We signed up for Hazel's walk months ago and despite being on bed rest, I did attend with our family. Rest assured, I did not walk and did a lot of sitting. I still desired to be there to support Ryan and Angie, even for the short time we were able to stay.
Sorry for all of the photos, but it showed more than I could ever write here. For more information on CHD's, check out It's My Heart online.

What I've Learned

**Otherwise titled: Thoughts From The Couch (and by couch I mean the couch in my living room, not the cushy couch in a doctor's office. Just so you know.)

Life is different here. Days are unique in our home. And that is okay. It's just gotta be for now.

Perhaps no exciting revelations from my little corner of the world, but spending this much time resting and just 'being' allows for more thought than a normal day as a wife and mom might.

Hope and Pray. Of course I knew how much both of these were an important and meaningful part of my daily life, but they've become even more of a source of strength. It took us four years of struggling to begin a new life within me and if I learned anything, I learned hope. Despite many uncertainties during that time, I could not lose hope and trust that God would see us through. Last week as we drove to ER, I faltered and questioned, but I knew that I could not give in and give up hope for this child. In the days that have followed, I have drawn on that hope and faith so that each day seems brighter and more manageable.

Life is Precious. Again, obvious. But with each time that I hear the sweet heartbeat of our little one and feel the little flutters, I realize just how precious that gift is. Oh how we all have fallen in love with this child! My time on the couch resting is for baby as well as for myself. It decreases risks to both of us immensely. I know that it is necessary. From here, I also see differently my growing children. They are able to adapt and move through their day needing me only minimally. I get to just watch them play and converse in their own little world with their toys because I am not rushed in the to-do's of daily life. Almost nothing goes unnoticed or under appreciated. From here, I can see it all. (Well, except for the pantry and refrigerator which seem to be Jonah's go-to places these days since he is ALWAYS hungry)

I am Blessed. There are more things laying on the floor than I normally can tolerate, my dining room table is full of the temporary residents of Little People-ville and the weather outside my window is dreary. But, I am blessed. Although the children don't quite understand the full meaning of my time of bed rest, they are doing their best. Quarreling seems to be at a minimum, restlessness barely evident and whining seems to be in check. We are surviving. My husband is being as devoted as always, sacrificing as necessary and doing his best to care for all of us in addition to returning back to work. Although things around home aren't done perfectly (read: MY way), I'm okay with that since they are done with perfect love. In the end, some of it just doesn't matter, does it? We are blessed to have family who live close enough that have supported us through many small ways and bigger ways too. None of that goes unnoticed when mom is out of commission. Gratefully blessed, we certainly are!

Time marches on: With each day that passes, it has turned into a week and into another week that baby is doing well. Each week will lead us to week 20 when we will have another ultrasound to check if the placenta previa has improved and we'll be half way! My oldest 'baby' will find her seventh year coming to a close and I will quickly have an eight year old in my household. Jonah is not so much my 'baby' any more with our new baby on his/her way. I've spent five wonderful years seeing and treating my little man as my forever baby. He's ready to grow up and finally, with a new arrival on the distant horizon I am ready to let him. Reed and I celebrated our ninth anniversary this past week and in so many ways it is unbelievable that we are nearly to year ten. We are already thinking about next year's anniversary and perhaps a small family trip in-state that will allow our family of five to spend time away together. And time marches on.


Finally, I've also been contemplating a few words that were a part of the prayer that Dr. K prayed with us in the ER: 'if this has happened in order for us to stop and draw us closer to You, then use this time to be reminded of Your presence in our lives' (or something close to that effect). May this time be sent to us as a gift to strengthen our bond with God, as well as in our family.

Things are all but normal around our house for the next couple of weeks at least, but we're adjusting. We are all in some way preparing for a new life in our household and God's just being sure that we keep that in mind.

Wordless Wednesday: Back To School

My Kindergartener:

My Second Grader:

Don't Rush It Little Boy

Boy: I wish I was grown up already.

Mom: Well I think you are pretty grown up already. You're such a big boy.

Boy: No I'm not. I'm not an adult yet.

Mom: I don't really think being an adult is that exciting. Why do you want to be an adult so bad?

Boy: Because I feel like going to a hotel and staying overnight. If I was an adult I could just leave and go there myself. I don't think I'd even stay in Misohta (Minnesota) either. Maybe I'd go to Pennsylvania.


Apparently a certain little boy thinks that we adults have all the fun. And, that Pennsylvania would be the perfect place for a getaway. I guess I'm not the only one feeling a little cooped up these days. Thankfully, grandpa and grandma came over for a visit, that should help my little man.

How We Spent Our Summer

This list is not so much for you, the reader, as it is for me. Most of the things we did this summer I did post with plenty of pictures. Tired of all of those yet?? I mostly wanted to actually put into print what we did do so that I can look back on the memories fondly.

**June**

~ Picnic/Park with Grandma to finish off school year
~ Little Flowers Luncheon
~ Feast of the Sacred Heart: We found out we're having a baby!!
~ Family outing sponsored by Diocesan Office
~ Diocesan Ordinations/Park with Papa
~ Trip to scenic overlook/big Mary statue for Father's Day
~ Zoomobile at local library/Park with friends
~ Band Festival

**July**

~ July 4th parade/boat parade
~ Met with out of town friends for picnic/play time for the kids
~ My Hometown parade/festival
~ Parish bus trip to Fargo, ND. St. Joachim & Anne Church/picnic
~ Two weeks of swimming lessons
~ Celebrated Lily's name day: We told the kids they were going to be
big brother/big sister in February!
~ Great nephew #1 was born!
~ Penguin Party at local zoo/picnic lunch with Papa
~ Local Garden Tour with my mom
~ Had my first OB appointment
~ Celebrated Jonah's name day with bumper cars/mini golf/ice cream treats
~ Helped host Vocations Camp
~ County Fair


**August**

~ Two overnights at hotel/trip to Stillwater/Como Zoo
~ Great niece #4 was born!
~ Another County Fair
~ Trip to the ER/hospital stay for Mommy & Baby


I'm sure I have missed a number of things here, but that's ok. I wanted merely to remind myself that in the midst of not always feeling the best this summer that we still were quite busy and had a lot of fun. I cannot even list all of the days we spent outside having picnics, the kids running in the sprinkler and me tending the flowers. There's just too many to mention.

All in all, not a bad summer. Some very precious memories were made, cute photos taken and remembrances of my children's summer at ages 5 and 7, as well as the last summer we were a family of 4. We cannot wait until next summer when all FIVE of us will spend our days together making new memories as a family!

Where I've Been

**Editor's Note: Since publishing this post, I've gotten several comments of concern. Before you read this post, know that baby and mom are both doing well and resting at home.**

Tuesday morning started out like all the others, delirious and tired, but ready for the new day. Getting ready to hop in the shower I felt a sudden gush of fluid and thought I had a peeing accident. Upon checking I knew things were very different. Blood. It was surreal. I could not believe this was happening. In mere minutes, Reed was at my side, Dr. K was called and told me to get to ER, my in-laws were called to come stay with the kids who were still snuggled in bed. Disbelief filled my head. Panic and tears. This wasn't happening, couldn't be happening.

Within 20 minutes we were out the door. I grabbed my purse, my St. Gianna relic medal and my camera. If something went very wrong, I'd want to have it. But my mind was not going there. We were not giving up. This child is our little miracle, our blessing and it was counting on me not to give up hope. Arriving at ER, I walked in feeling completely fine. No cramping, not feeling sick, hungry if anything. Besides the bleeding, I felt like I shouldn't even be there.

My paperwork was ready to go since my doctor had called in letting them know of my arrival. I was escorted to a small room and the nurse began taking vitals, labs were drawn and I was in a hospital gown quickly. In appeared Dr. K and he talked with his reassuring voice, kept our hopes up and proceeded with caution and protocol. He listened for baby's heartbeat and almost instantly found it again. This was reassuring. Upon a physical exam, it was concluded that there didn't seem to be any other area that the bleeding was coming from up behind the placenta. That was good. Again Dr. K spoke with us laying before us what was possibly ahead of us and reminding us that unfortunately at 16 weeks if I delivered, there would be no chance for survival for baby. Before heading down to the ultrasound area, he asked if we should pray together. Not for the first time, I was reminded why we chose this physician, why we need this physician and why we are so blessed to have him supporting and guiding us. Tears filled my eyes as we prayed that God's will be done.

Our morning was again blessed with another wonderful staff person as the ultrasound tech cared for us very well. If nothing else, this whole episode granted us the chance to see our little one for the very first time. What a show-off! He/she was in there moving like crazy and kept moving their hand around reaching, waving, covering their face. Baby is completely fine. Measuring and looking exactly where he/she needs to be at this point. Again, good news.

The not so good news was that the ultrasound also revealed why I was bleeding. I have marginal placenta previa. Normally the bleeding would start due to a fall or something else traumatic that triggered it, but I had nothing in the days prior to it. I felt pretty much normal, no cramping, no pain, no spotting. If there is a good side, there is still a chance for the placenta to move up further as baby grows and would move away from the cervix causing the risk to be much less and for me to carry through pregnancy and allow for a normal delivery.

Due to the fact that I was still at least bleeding some, it was decided that I needed to stay in the hospital for observation. I was stationed in a room somewhere between post-op geriatrics and pediatrics. I felt so completely fine that I felt completely out of place. In order for optimal observation, I stayed overnight and was monitored. I was given numerous chances to hear baby's heartbeat again as they checked it. Sweet sounds to a worried mama. Baby has also decided to take the opportunity in the last day to make his/herself known and I'm feeling more and more little flutters as baby moves. I take each of these as sweet rewards and assurances that everything is going to be all right. And I pray.

I arrived back at home late this morning and I'm on household bed rest for the next week. I can be up and around at home, but need to rest and put my feet up often too. This is critical and important for baby and I, this much I know. BUT, I cannot help but feel worry and fear as it tempts to creep in. We're praying that changes come in the coming weeks and placenta and baby do move up. This would be a welcome blessing. I'm also praying that the small amount of bleeding does subside and that an episode such as this does not reoccur.

I will take this time to slow down and take it as a way of drawing us closer to God. I will also be honest in sharing with you that this is all tough for a 'planner' mama. A mom who has homeschooling to start next week, who has a September calendar filled to overflowing, who would like to be outside walking on the cooler days ahead. Yes, this is all for the greater good and I need to do all that is possible to make this a restful time for mine and baby's safety and health.

I come here again asking for your prayers because I know that you are women (and perhaps men) of faith who I need so desperately to storm heaven with prayer. Thank you in advance.


**Here's your bonus to making it to the end of this very lengthy post: Baby photos!