I'm reminded that even in Advent, my heart aches. This is my MOST FAVORITE time of year, but I still haven't gotten the hang of living through it in complete joy. Five years later, my heart still yearns for the child we were supposed to have the week before Christmas. Our Christmas Child. And secretly since, I have still yearned to bring home a Christmas Blessing one day. A newborn to hold and cuddle in the late hours as the room is only illuminated by the Christmas tree. Yes, perhaps that is a bit too fairy tale and unrealistic, but I still dream it any way.
Instead, I find myself trying desperately to cling to the Child that is brought to us Christmas morning as I long to find the peace of mind and heart that the season should bring.
Instead, I find myself trying desperately to cling to the Child that is brought to us Christmas morning as I long to find the peace of mind and heart that the season should bring.
'Our hearts are restless until they rest in Thee, O Lord' ~St. Augustine~
With tears, my heart and prayers go out for you.
ReplyDeleteprayers for you Sarah, that your heart may find healing and peace..
ReplyDeletePraying for you!! Maybe St Andrew will come through for us both this year! Here's to hoping! ;)
ReplyDeletePraying for you, Sarah!
ReplyDeleteSending hugs and prayers, Sarah!! I will be home all day tomorrow...call if you feel the need to chat!!
ReplyDeleteThanks for all of the prayers and thoughts....I count on them and know that I am blessed abundantly by them!
ReplyDeleteOh dear.
ReplyDeleteThis one was a kick in the gut I just wasn't expecting. Thank you for being so real. So raw. But wow, that image of the snuggled babe by twinkling lights got me boo-hooing all over the place.
Yeesh. I want that too. There I said it.
;)
I love you - you're incredible.
Walk it - live it - embrace it. Remember, the Ressurection itself is only joyful BECAUSE of the crucifixion. Without the horror and agony of His Passion, the joy would be hollow. So too it is with Christmas knowing that He is coming. He will be born so that he may die. And we? We must die to live.